Divorce can be difficult for a variety of reasons, whether you filed for separation or vice versa. Regardless of the reason for your divorce, the process of loving yourself and finding yourself after it is all done can be emotionally a lot. If you find yourself at this stage, you may worry that these feelings will last forever, or that your journey to self-love may be too hard. And although everyone is different and processes difficult situations in their own way, there are ways to overcome a divorce and even learn from past situations.
No matter how your divorce process went, you need time to come to terms with the end of a relationship and grieve. But with that comes the fulfilling experience of getting to know yourself better, developing new hobbies and relationships, and even having satisfying relationships outside of your romantic life. There are so many ways you can learn to love yourself after your divorce. Your process will be unique to you, and so it should be! If you are looking for ways to move forward and practice self-love after your divorce, there are just a few things you can do here.
How to love yourself after divorce
1. Allow yourself to grieve
Some people don’t think they need to grieve, and while everyone is different and processes change in their own way, it is perfectly normal to experience a range of emotions about the end of a romantic relationship. Whether or not you were the person who ended your marriage, divorce is a big life change. Whether you are feeling sad, angry, scared, or alone, remember that these feelings are part of the grieving process and will pass over time.
2. Rebuild your relationships
Divorce can put a strain on your external relationships, just as it can affect your actual romantic relationship. Many people find that they need the support of friends and loved ones after a divorce. Even if you haven’t been here that much because of your marriage or divorce, it’s never too late to reconnect with loved ones. Community building can help you heal and you may find that it will help you move forward faster.
3. Start by liking yourself
While it may sound a bit cheesy, liking yourself and enjoying your company can be a good starting point when it comes to moving on after a divorce. Self-love can often feel like a demanding task, especially when you have a lot ahead of you emotionally and practically. Instead of immediately asking for self-love, you can start by focusing on what you like about yourself. As in any relationship, you don’t have to be head over heels right away for your love to grow and blossom over time!
4. Engage in hobbies and activities
Much like learning to like yourself, activities that make you feel good and move your thoughts to happier places can be a great way to enjoy the time you have with your newfound freedom. Do you remember this hobby or pastime that you never took the time to try out during your marriage? Now is the time to dive headfirst into whatever it is! This is your chance to get to know yourself in a whole new way! Go to class, meet new people, and if you don’t like it, try something different.
5. Focus on wellness
While physical health isn’t the complete key to mental health unlocking, the two are strongly related. While you probably shouldn’t be on a crazy post-divorce diet or revenge body kick, focusing on wellness is about serving you and your needs through the way you treat your physical body. It can be so easy to remind yourself to drink enough water and go outside once a day, or it could be a new workout that you love and feed your body plenty of nutritious foods. Everyone is different, and that means you should figure out what you need and get into it.
6. Try to date casually – if you want
You should never push yourself to date – or anything – until you are ready. However, if you feel really ready to get out again, starting out with some casual dates and a little bit of flirting could be a great first step for you. Dating and relationships can be a bit overwhelming at times, especially when you come out of a year-long marriage and come back on stage. But if you go on a few dates here and there, you can be reminded of the wide variety of people the world has to offer. Socialization can be a powerful thing in any form.
Love yourself after divorce
When coming out of a divorce, it’s important to remember that you are strong, capable, and amazing for who you are. There are so many ways to love yourself after a divorce, and while everyone is different, there are a variety of techniques that you can try until you start feeling love all over the place! From rebuilding relationships to focusing on your health, there is nothing you cannot conquer!
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