Les Linz [email protected]
Warning: This column is politically incorrect and uses the tool of exaggeration. Read at your own risk.
I loved her as a kid. I love her as an adult. Game shows.
My plan to pay for college was simple: take a week off, fly from Illinois to California, and earn the unbeaten sale of the century title.
I’ve always beaten their champions, then and now. Sure, I’d have to pay taxes on the winnings, but I could always sell a car or boat that I won for it. If I played my cards right (oh wait, this is another Jim Perry show) I would still have enough left to take early retirement and use my education to engage in exotic hobbies.
Then I woke up.
Do we really need game shows? Absolutely. They serve as a much needed escape during these turbulent times, especially when we interact with Washington.
Here then are real game shows, either existing or still in existence, that give their titles to the way we may or may not view the capital of our nation and its practices or politics in general.
Jen Psaki
As the White House press secretary, she has a tough job and deserves a category of her own:
In Pressure Cooker (the place where she lives), “Everybody’s Talking” play while she plays, “Extreme Dodgeball” and “What’s My Line?” (The shortest distance between two points, not just what is asked when the Teleprompter breaks). When a reporter asks a meaningful question, she reprimands them with “It’s academic” (where she knows the question is important but doesn’t want to answer), and the reporter asks, “Whose line is it anyway?” since the points do not matter. That’s right, they are like us reporters who are completely ignored. It’s Jen’s job to “say it with acting” and quell any “rumor that it has”. Ms. Psaki skillfully pauses and maintains control of the periodic query while announcing, “Wait, wait … don’t tell me,” while demonstrating her professional skills in using Wordplay to actually “The Last Word” to have.
How we tend to look at America
“Make me laugh” is our general response to the “I am from the government and here to help you” comment. We ask politicians of both parties, in light of the passed or proposed Bonehead legislation, “Are you smarter than a fifth grader?” We beg them, “Balance Your Budget” (I’ll send an archived video to the administration) and we cry so because as America we have “debts” up to our eyeballs. So we shout “Pay It Off” and stop believing you have a “blank check”. “Get the message.” We are a “divided” nation that collectively plays “taboo” because our opinions do not matter unless they agree with the opinions of the masses.
congress
“To tell the truth” is what is required of those who testify before Congress. “Truth or Consequences” is to be expected, which often results in many Witnesses in Congress experiencing “amnesia”.
Congress is also known as “Liar’s Club” which is known as the “Majority Rules” (also known as the Nuclear Option) and the occasional “Dirty Rotten Cheater”.
Republican-Democratic Interactions
Let’s make a deal, what Republicans regularly do with Democrats. “Get a lead,” the same Republicans and some Democrats warn the vice president to get one on the southern border.
“Have a heart” what Democrats say to Republicans – not to be confused with a brain, what Republicans say to Democrats – or “Hava Nagila” what Israelis say to the rest of us, regardless of our political affiliation. It means “come. We’re pleased. “
And then there is “Show Me the Money,” which Republicans are asking the government to do, especially what is or is not being spent on the southern border, “Challenge”.
How do we not see America? With the help of the media.
“Small Talk”, “Softballs” gently threw Candidate Biden the way in the face of “Headline Chasers”, “Hidden Agenda” (as advocated by both CNN and Facebook, although they become less hidden over time) and ” Distraction “What If you’re going to do all of this to make it happen, Estate of Panic” provides temporary protection for media professionals who will need to be impounded when Conservatives see victory. This can be achieved together if CNN encourages its employees with the words “Let’s Play Reporter”.
Politics in general
Politicians play “Press Your Luck” when they ignore their voters. If they do not know Jack at first, it is because they rule by what “America says” and implement their plan regardless of empirical evidence, which is why they are soon told “Your number is high” ”(As in, they will not win a re-election offer).
If a party does not want to be seen that they do nothing, they “give up the money”. This leads those in charge to believe that they are only offering “lip service” that DC is “Oblivious” to us.
To run for office is first of all “Winsanity”. Everything is done to maintain the seat. “Crossword puzzles” are spoken by the opponents during the campaign and the “party line” (“Everyone else is scum”) is shouted from the rooftops all the time while “Who’s still standing?” is the topic of increased media attention.
Everything we hear from both candidates and politicians is “Balderdash”. Occasionally, members of a group do not see each other on an equal footing and a “family feud” ensues. Often times, the differences concern whether or not it is advisable to break the bank.
The “Rich List” is collectively known as Public Enemy No. 1. Some made the list because they wanted “Get Rich Quick” (insider dealer’s song), though their bubble is often called “tattletales” (aka “burst” whistleblowers).
“Supermarket Sweep” may be a futile DHS operation disguised as a raid to round up undocumented Democrats. However, everything is fine because in the end everyone wins.
Different games
As with Ms. Psaki, there are some people or groups that have their own category, such as lobbyists.
After they leave public office, their spouse can be heard pleading with them “Feather Your Nest” and the response of the agreement “Anything for Money” because they know they want to be a “millionaire”.
And then there are President Trump and his family.
“Call my Bluff” (no longer applies). “Glamor Girl” (The youngest former first lady). Inquizition. Also describes the nomination hearings for the US Supreme Court. “Separation Anxiety” (What He Had) and “Trump Card” (The Former President That Makes You Laugh).
COVID efforts
Along with Beat the Clock and Every Second Counts, President Biden’s efforts to meet the COVID vaccination goal based on the foundation established by the previous government. Kudos to both of them.
immigration
“The Wall” (The aim of the game is to stop the previous wall building, which will lead to increased illegal immigration, while at the same time blaming the previous administration for the problem. Once you do that, you win). “Face the Facts” (What the administration must do against the border crisis). “Pick a Date” (exhortation to Kamala Harris to visit the southern border).
Some additional games that stand on their own
“You are the expert” (a game similar to a soccer ball, except that the goal posts do not remain stationary, but can be moved up and down the field as required).
“The Great Day” (January 20th, 2021 for Joe Biden and everyone who voted for him).
“The price is right” (approx. 600,000 US dollars)
“Free 4 All” (government re-election strategy)
“Daily Dilemmas” (Which Executive Order should I sign first today?)
“Deal or No Deal” (What should we propose or not propose to Iran today?)
“Russian Roulette” (Biden’s Soviet Union Relationship)
“Follow the Leader” (What Biden Did After Beating His Predecessor)
“How do you rate?” (Asked by the Federal Reserve)
“I’ll buy this” (the administration’s spending plan)
“Judge for Yourself” (Biography of Honorable US Supreme Court Justice Amy Coney Barrett)
“About Faces” (John Kerry, he was out for game shows before actually being against them)
“Keep it in the Family” (What the Chinese Say About Political Contributions)
“Child Support” (A Biden Production)
“Remote Control” (bestseller subtitled “The Joe Biden Story” by Nancy Pelosi)
“Remember that?” (The President’s theme song)
“Surprise package” (describes the constantly changing stimulus calculations)
“Triple Threat” (The dynamic trio: Harris, Schumer and Pelosi)
“They’re out” (the squad)
Conclusion
“Danger!” (What about America when its citizens’ freedoms begin to crumble?)
Whether we like the administration or not, it is up to us whether we are ready to pray for it or chase after it.
What are you gonna do america That is the “$ 64,000 question”. And one last admonition to the administration, Congress and politicians of all kinds: “Get the message.”
Note to readers: If you would like to learn more about any or all of these game shows, click the following link: en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_American_game_shows.
Seymour’s Les Linz writes the column “Humor: More or Les”. You can find information about Linz on his author’s website at amazon.com. Send comments to [email protected].
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